The Daily Mail, famously, has two obsessions (both attested, below right, from today’s edition):
¶ articles with headline-questions to which the answer unfailingly a resounding “No!” [© John Rentoul at the Indy]
¶ that online “side-bar of shame” with pics of D-list celebrities not quite showing their all, in bikinis or suffering wardrobe malfunctions (suitably edited).
We expect higher things from the Torygraph, so let’s segue swiftly there.
Ah! The sports report! Should be PG-viewing!
Alas, beneath the header:
we get some seedy stuff.
¶ Item: the hot-link to:
Owl Mascot Kicked to Death by Soccer Player
Fortunately nothing to do with Sheffield Wednesday’s Ozzie, Baz or Ollie.
¶ Then, clearly in the sporting tradition, there’s this:
Woman Blows Up Factory Where Dad Died Sky News
In which case, Sarah Griffiths did well to rid the King’s Lynn skyline of the tower from the Campbell’s Soup Factory (also deceased). Lynn (as a Norfolk lad by origin, Malcolm feels he knows the place well enough to be on surname terms) has a marvellous, if neglected core, and some of the finest unappreciated buildings in Britain — it’s the hinterland that depresses.
¶ Much in the Mail tradition, there’s stuff like:
Oooh … Auntie! How naughty!
¶ Very sporty, there’s the link to Chelsea supporters on the 4 pm train back from Norwich.
Yes, they’re chanting racist slogans again. This is, of course, the hang-over from John Terry’s nose-to-nose job with QPR’s Anton Ferdinand (and Chelsea about to go to Loftus Road in a Cup Tie). What really makes the grade here is to scan down that particular page to the “authorised” and “approved” comments, such as:
Makes one speculate on how much poison is needed for a comment to be redacted.
¶ And, if you’re really, really lucky …
From the “sports” pages, you’ll get a link to
Housemate ‘raped live on Brazilian Big Brother’
A housemate on Brazilian Big Brother was allegedly raped live on television in front of millions of viewers.
The Telegraph is anxious for us to know that justice was done, and seen to be done:
Daniel Echaniz has not been arrested or charged with any crime but was removed from the programme by producers for ‘gravely inadequate’ behaviour
This sports lark reminds Malcolm of the inspirational thought of O.J.Simpson, no less:
The day you take complete responsibility for yourself, the day you stop making any excuses, that’s the day you start to the top.