Andy? Is that really you?

Does the Guardian‘s ever-delightful Notes & Queries column want to imply something? Try this:

How best to avoid being bitten by a menacing dog?

Dogs always think that they live in a pack, and normally all you have to do to subdue a (psychologically undamaged) animal is to assert convincingly that you stand higher in the hierarchy than he does. If baring your teeth, snapping and barking loudly is beyond you, any gadget shop will sell an ultrasonic device that will bark very loudly on your behalf, at a pitch conveniently beyond human, but not canine, hearing. I’ve seen such an instrument work astonishingly well on a Greek village dog: dog to hangdog in a second.

Andrew Coulson, Musselburgh, E Lothian

Well, he knows about psychological damage, about positioning in the hierarchy, barking, about going from  dog to hangdog in a second, and — most suspiciously of all — about the electronic contents of gadget shops. And his name … Andy, is that really you?

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Filed under Guardian, Murdoch, reading, sleaze., Tories.

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