Memo to pigeons:
1. This is a cotoneaster horizontalis. You have been devouring those berries for some weeks. Enjoy. Leave some for the tits.
2. This is a ten-inch sponge-rubber football, left behind by the grand-sons. It is not some ginormous berry. Do not be deceived by the colour. It is quite inedible (but that hasn’t prevented your repetitive experiments at consumption). The tits are obviously brighter, or less ambitious than you.
And that was Malcolm’s sixteen-hundredth post.