Floaters

Once upon a time, Malcolm rented a basement flat in close proximity to Dublin’s Lansdowne Road. Should y0u prefer: Bóthar Lansdúin, D4. Adjacent to the rugby ground.

Also convenient to the buses into Trinity College, and — when the last nickel went over the bar at O’Neill’s in Suffolk Street (or wherever), Malcolm could always walk back to a lonely pit.

The rent on that flat was just £6 a month. No! Don’t marvel. There were down-sides. No toilet (sneak upstairs and borrow). No bath. One tap and a bucket.

Oh! When the sewer-cover lifted,  there were floating turds by the back door. Right outside where Malcolm’s bed-head was. Then he had to go in with the sticks.

Nice. Or not.

To this day he knows not why his “hit-rate” was so worse than “babe-magnet” Nick Clegg. It might just be that sewer-cover.

So, let us move on …

Actually: it was the movements which caused Malcolm most grief.

Had you inspected…

You might have found in today’s Times [£] the misery equally felt by Mark White of Bracklesham Caravan & Boat Club [let’s term that the BC&BC].  Mark’s problem is that Chichester Borough Council may be approving a further fifty dwellings “up stream”. The BC&BC have noticed that a previous development of over a hundred houses, about fifteen years ago, caused problems:

Locals objecting to the proposed developments say that even after moderate rainfall they are unable to flush toilets because of blocked drains.

Hold on there!

Malcolm has sat through sessions enough of local authority planning committees to know that foul water and surface water sewers should not interconnect.

Even so (again with that Times report):

… the club floods several times a year and has closed twice due to sewage coming up through drains.

Malcolm remembers it well. After the sticks, he always needed a long, hot wallow at the (long-dismantled) TCD bath-house. Followed by a change of clothes from the flesh outwards.

All is for the best in this best of all possible worlds

David Brocklebank, managing director at the developer Wates, says technical experts have concluded that the new homes will have “no adverse effect on flodd risk to the surrounding area”.

A spokesman for Chichester District Council added that  “all comments from local residents will be considered together with advice from the Southern Water, the Environment Agency and the council’s own drainage engineer”.

Lest we forget:

Think on.

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Filed under Conservative family values, Dublin., sleaze., Times

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